Lessons My Kids Teach Me. Part 712

I wanted to make a pit stop at the grocery store but, as is common among those in my age group, I forgot. I remembered just as I passed the road that that led to the store. " $%#&*@!"  I mumbled under my breath (or so I thought)

Rileigh: What, dad?
Me: Nothing honey.
Rileigh: What wrong daddy?
Me: Nothing's wrong baby.
Rileigh: Oh. [pause] Then why you say that: sonofabitch?
Me:  Uh, what?
Rileigh: You say sonofabitch.
Me:  [removing one hand from the wheel to slap self in forehead] Oh, I forgot to turn back there so we can go to the food store. 
Rileigh: [in her patronizing, conciliatory tone- that sounds remarkably like what you would hear when someone is talking to a 5 year old who has just spilled his milk] It's okay daddy, we can go an "utter" way.
Me: Yes honey, we sure can go another way. 
Rileigh: [giggling now] You're silly, daddy!

Yes, indeed I am silly.

Confessions of a Geeky Dad

I am stuck inside on a rainy Sunday on this Match Eve trying not to think too much about the 24 1/2 hours that remain until I find out if I matched into a residency program. Fortunately I have Chemistry to keep me company.

No not drugs. Chemistry- as in High School Chemistry.

Kaitlyn was having a little trouble with some chemistry homework and came to yours truly looking for help. Poor her. I have a reputation for handing out the "bonus plan" when I help with homework. Today's Bonus Lecture was about Avagadro's number but more on that later.
Invariably, I go off on some topical tangent until they get that glazed-over look in their eyes. utter, "Thanks, Dad", quickly gather their books, and dart out of the room like they stole something.
I admit it. I can be a bit of a geek and I still get excited about some concepts that I think are pretty cool and it truly is a thrill for me to see the look in their eyes when they finally understand something for the first time or look at something in a new way. Anyway...

Her class is working on determining empirical formulas given percent composition.

An example:
Calculate the empirical formula of a compound composed of 38.67 % Carbon, 16.22 % Hydrogen, and 45.11 %Nitogen  (For those that are interested a brief explanation follows the break.)


During my explanation I asked if she was familiar with Avagadro's Number and I was happy that she was. Of course I felt the need to fill in some of the blanks and connect a few dots. I found a paper I wrote on the subject from back in my undergraduate chemistry class and read some of it to her. The little kid in me loves the visualizations and examples used when trying to understand the enormity of scale that 6.02 X10²³ represents. Here are some of my favorites:

• A mole of beer cans would cover the surface of the earth to a depth of 200 miles!
• A mole of un-popped popcorn kernels would cover the suface to a depth of 9 miles!
• If you covered the entire state of Texas (roughly 260,000 sq mi.) with fine sand- there would be 1 mole of sand grains.
• Counting at 10 million per second...it would take 2 Billion years to count up to 1 mole

and my favorite:

• In a 8oz cup of water, there are more molecules of water present than there are cups of water in the entire Atlantic Ocean. (roughly 5000 times more)

Click to expand solution

Halloween Pics

As requested, some Halloween pictures:

One Cute Little Pirate

One Not-So-Amused Elephant

In Search of: Candy

This year: (click the play button to see video)

Quite a difference from last year:

Pee Pee in the Potty Conga

They say it is the little things in life that are to be treasured. I suppose that is true.

Lately we have been encouraging Rileigh to sit on her potty everyday once or twice, in an effort to transition her into some serious potty training down the road. Well, tonight during such an attempt she sat on the potty and made her customary "psssssss" sound to signify her peeing (this is ALL she usually does- is make the sound) and then demanded toilet paper and washed her hands- I suppose, at least, we are ingraining hygienic habits.

Anyway after this little mock micturition she gathered herself and made her way back to playing with her 7,149 toys that lay strewn about the living room. Several minutes later I was in the bedroom when I heard my wife shreik er...mention that there was indeed some of the golden fruits of our little darling's hard working nephrons sparkling at the bottom of the pint sized potty. She had somehow managed to run back into the bathroom and conduct a covert urination operation while Kathy was preparing dinner.

As is the custom in my household, whenever one of our clan overcomes the genetic boundaries, acheives expert marksmanship, and actually deposits urine in the receptacle designed with the expressed purpose of containing it- it is cause for much celebration. I for one like to celebrate our successes and not dwell on any of the shortfalls (unlike my wife and her inability to forget the infamous 3am drunken livingroom accident or the dreaded toilet seat faux paus of 2006) Anyway, this was clearly a time to rejoice.

I took the lead during an un-precedented rendition of the "Pee Pee in the Potty Conga" song complete with rolling hand motions and gesticulating dance moves. I would love to post a video of the aformentioned spectacle, but we were so caught up in the peeing pandemonium that it slipped my mind to capture the event on film. Trust me when I tell you it was quite the sight to behold!

I smiled broad and long.

Who knew urine could bring such happiness?

It really is the little things.

Relay for Life Pictures

Better late than never I suppose; here are some pictures from last week's Relay for Life Event.

Soon after setting up our tents and getting our gear unpacked it poured off-and-on for a few hours but it didn't seem to dampen anyone's fun. Relay was a good time despite the rain and it raises a bunch of money for a good cause. Thanks again to everyone who donated to our team!

Meagan even convinced me to sign up for the CP3 Cancer prevention study and have some blood drawn. CP3 hopes to enroll 1/2 a million people from ages 30-65 and follow them for 20 years (Nothing like a 20 year commitment!) looking for incidences of cancer and associated blood markers, lifestyle and dietary habits, and other factors to establish links and subsequently prevention of cancer. Previous CP studies, for instance, were responsible for linking smoking to cancer. It is supposed to take only about 45 mins every 2 years to fill out a mailed survey so we will see how it goes.

Meagan and Autumn:




Susie and Bruce:




Kaitlyn and her old man:



Silly Face Brigade:




Rileigh doing her first of many laps:




Rileigh getting a ride around the track:



Fashion provided courtesy of Megg and Kait:



Meagan and her aunt Michele, a cancer survivor:



Bruce manning the (unforgiving) cotton candy machine:




Selling cotton candy - we raised over $220.00 $248.00- not bad at only $2 each (the ADA was protesting outside of the event !)




Middle of the night shots:





Waking up isn't so pleasant for everyone:



Made it to the morning:

Weekend Roundup (Late Edition)

John Lennon wrote the lyric, "Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans." Lately I feel like I truly understand what he meant.

Much has happened since my last post, I'll try to recap the highlights.

My daughter Kaitlyn turned 15 Friday and to celebrate, Kathy, Rileigh, Dylan and I drove down and spent a very nice extended weekend at Susie and Bruce's. For those who don't know, Susie is my ex-wife and the mother of my 3 oldest children and Bruce is her husband. We wind up spending many weekends at their house where all the kids are together and we have a great time. I suppose it seems weird to most people, but I am really glad we all get along and get to spend so much time together with the kids. So, anyway, Friday we all went out to a pretty good cheeseburger place and followed it up with a barbecue and swimming in their pool. Here are some pictures from this weekend:

Cheeburger-Cheeburger is over-run by our not so little clan:



Johnny STUNS us all by whipping out his card and offering to pay:



Kaitlyn opening presents:



The birthday girl and her mommy. (mommy is the shorter one..hehehehe)



Kaitlyn and Meagan



Kathy and Dylan enjoying the weather



Our little camera-shy monster



One of my favorite pics: Rileigh donning protective glasses to counteract the glare bouncing off the top of my bald head!





Meanwhile, I have scheduled both of the next "big" exams for finishing medical school. I was originally slotted for mid-September, but got lucky and was able to switch to a spot in Chicago on June 10th for my USMLE Step 2 CS exam. This is a practical exam that consists of 12 patient encounters with professional actor patients where we are graded on things like communication skills, clinical examination skills, our ability to formulate a differential diagnosis, and writing a note documenting our findings and ordering the next set of labwork/imaging studies/diagnositic studies etc.. (and yes, there is a whole module dedicated to making patients wait 45 minutes in an uncomfortable paper gown while we sit in an office and surf the internet- in case you were wondering) I finalized my travel and hotel arrangements just a few minutes ago , so we are all set.

Also scheduled is the "written" part of my Step 2 board exam. It is actually computer based, consists of 400 questions, and takes about 9 hours. D-Day is August 10th. Yay!


Peds is going along okay and I will save some material for an upcoming post.... stay tuned.

Relay For Life

It is that time of year again.

My oldest daughter, Meagan is once again captaining a Relay for Life team and this year has recruited her sister Kaitlyn to share the captaining duties.

For those who do not know, the Relay for Life event is a 24hr walking marathon around the high school's track. At all times someone from each team has someone walking around...and around...and around...and.... More info about the event here.

Last year yours truly made it to the event and despite being extremely sleep deprived, I had a great time. This year I look forward to again walking around aimlessly- a skill I have significantly mastered over the last year!

Last year her team raised $2300.00 $2500.00* for the American Cancer Society and this year they are looking to do the same.

This is where you guys come in.

I don't ask for much on this blog, but this is a worthwhile cause; so if you can find it in your hearts to click on their team's page and make a donation, however small, I would be terribly obliged. Thanks.





*which earned the team the Bronze team title. Thanks for correcting me Meg!

Terrible Twos

We knew it wouldn't last forever.

I am not sure if it is her way of adjusting to her baby brother invading her well-marked space or just the age, but our little princess has officially entered the Monster stage of her development. I hope I live through it.

Over the last couple of weeks Rileigh has taken to letting us know she is "all-finished" eating by launching her plate (behind her head, or across the room, or simply tossing it over the side of her chair) and having it crash down splattering food all about the room. Joy.

We have tried several methods of dealing with this- all with less than effective results:

• A serious look and a stern "NO" in my most intimidating "dad" voice- usually met with the "cute doe-eyed face" and the phrase "I dropped, I dropped" ( as if to blame it all on gravity) This method was modified from the previous one that consisted of me yelling an assortment of expletives- Kathy informed me that this was not going to enrich her development and may only serve to expand her vocabulary- good point.
  
• A brief trial of not yelling at her, but "explaining" that it is not nice to hurl plates of food about also failed miserably. She would usually stare at us intently and nod her head in complete agreement and say, "I know". Still the plates flew.
• Even a little spank on the offending hand was only met with a pitiful confused look and continued aerodynamic testing of our dinner wear.
• My lovely wife even advocated a trial of "ignoring" the dish as it flew past. This plan never got off the ground- the other day Kathy was in the middle of trying to calm down a screaming Dylan while Rileigh was having lunch. I was in the back room reading , when I heard my wife yell in frustration.

Lately we have decided to be more pro-active and employ what I call the "microwave popcorn" approach. This consists of being vigilant during meals and snatching the plate from her whenever the popping eating slows down and there is more than several seconds between bites and she gets that "I'm finished" look in her eyes. So far it has worked pretty well. Until tonight.

Apparently we had let our guard slip down just enough and.... oh look, it's raining rice, corn, peas, and chicken cutlet!



I went back to my stern-face-"NO"-routine and put her in her crib for a brief "time-out". She has recently learned to say, "I'm sorry" and after a few minutes I got her out. I was about to clean up the mess when she walked over and looked down at her handiwork and employed her latest tactic:

Plead ignorance, blame it on someone else, and when all else fails, dazzle them with cuteness.

Female Genetics- Secrets Unlocked!

Since I don't have to report to the hospital until Wednesday afternoon, I decided to steal away and head home to spend some time with the family. An excited Rileigh and I were playing with one of her favorite toys, a series of plastic semi-circular blocks that interlock to form balls or stack to form a pyramid. Rileigh, and the balls in question are pictured below:


I was rolling one of the ad-hoc balls back and forth with her, when she suddenly grabbed the ball and pulled the blocks apart. I exclaimed, in my most unmanly of Dad voices, "uh-oh! you broke the ball". My mind, being my mind and all, I immediately cast a sideways glance at my wife who was sitting on the couch and said, "I know where she gets that gene!"

Surprisingly she giggled almost as hard as I did.